The first six lines are very strong! They seem to me to be either a stand alone poem or the first stanza in a longer work. Your final three lines were a bit cliche mostly because of the last line. What kind of memories were they? What were the memories? "Until I awoke" is pretty much filler. You can come up with something jarring to make the reader stop and think once she's finished! ;)
Just a quick note to you, I'm leaving FP for another writing workshop (w.rateyourwriting.com, if you're ever there my username is butterfly on a pin) but I'll still be dropping by here to see what you've done lately!
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