This is story was amazing, sad and beautiful.

I'd love to know how it continues but I can't buy your book because I live in a hellhole in South America. I tried sending you an email but it didn't work with the one you left. Hope you get this.

hi !

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love it!

i dont get it, so is Holden dead or not?

Oh my god. This is such a good story but I didn't expect this to happen! It is so sad I started crying. Is Holden dead or alive? I can't tell. :( This is a great story.

im so confused. did he die? is this story finished?

this story is awesome!

well done

Pebbs

Good start here. Just a suggestion, though: If you're going to have different people talking, either put things different people say in separate paragraphs, or at least make the paragraphs shorter. It gets a little confusing otherwise.

great story, I like it a lot. It's written well too. It's rather sad, but the end of that chapter confused me...I thought he was dead, but is he? or is the story not finished yet...?

-Tainted

i thought this story was really good thanks for submitting it

wow great story. I loved it and its so incredibly sad but its a great story and well written

That was a really sad story, I liked it a lot. I think perhaps in the beginning chapter or two you could've tried to play up Holden's poor behavior prior to meeting Jessica. Also, I think the fact that one of them didn't like math and the other didn't like English was a little too fortuitous. Lastly, the ending seemed to tie ends together too well. Putting in such a sad ending and leaving a light on? If so inclined, please e-mail as to your motives; I'm intrigued. Not to be negative, though! I thought the rest of the story was great, and very poignant. Definitely didn't see the ending coming. Keep writing, you're sure to receive widespread recognition someday!

THAT WAS SOME GOOD SHIT. I havent read a full story on this site in months and this one was SO worth it...u should b damn proud for having this.
KEEP IT UP

EXCELLENT story. Keep up the good work!

this is really good! please continue! i must know what happens next!
xoxo Rachel xoxo

I was just browsing and your story caught my eye. I like the idea, but I'd like to point out, when someone new start's talk, it's a new paragraph. Other then that, kudos to you!