Reviews for Sorrow in the Shadows

Reviews For: Sorrow in the Shadows

Chihiro 2007-09-05 ch 1, anon.	abuseThat was a really touching story..i havent read such good stories will a well planned plot for quite some time..I love the unexpected ending and your writing..you were descriptive enuf that i could imagined everything in my mind but not too much..keep up the good work!
Shadow Gryphon 2006-08-09 ch 1,	abuseA touching story. I liked how just what he had done was never mentioned until the very end, and how the papers from the beginning were brought up again at the end. And somehow, never giving him a name seemed to fit well.
it's not your fault 2005-11-26 ch 1,	abuseI like this quite a bit. Too bad its a one-shot and the magic has ended. tear ^_^ Its amazing, pulled me straight through from the beginning. Not much advice, except more detail on their feelings and adding some suspense and heart racing moments in there like... 'he clutched the hand tightly, turning an option over and over again in his mind on what he should do...' I can't explain all that much in this manner of writing, but I hope you get the idea nevertheless. I look forward to clicking on other stories by you and seeing the same great writing you've created. If rating was an option, it'd be the highest rating possible. Good work. thumbs up
a moth in lace 2005-08-15 ch 1,	abuseThat was spectacular. It brought tears to my eyes. Absolutely awesome. A few things as a suggestion: in the first paragraph, pored to poured, and in the sentence "A figure sitting on the wet ground, leaned against a rough stone wall...", get rid of the comma. You don't need one there. If there were any other spelling/grammar mistakes, I didn't spot them. Another thing that might have made it better would be changing the ending... It seemed kind of cold and emotionless, the way you described him as her son, and I didn't really like that he was... Maybe it's just me, but I think a small, blurry description of the crimes he committed..? I'm not sure, maybe that would take away from it even more.. Anyway, it's just a suggestion. Great story. -marie PS: Thank you for your review. Although, you would have understood why the title was "the siren who lost her voice" had you read the summary. :)
LemonFlats 2005-08-15 ch 1,	abuseNormally I'm not one to review fiction, as I think that whether it's good or not depends on who is reading it. However, you suggested it in your profile, so I'll give it a shot. - "The rain pored down in steady grey sheets," **poured "A powerful hand reached out, and pulled the hood covering his face down lower over his eyes." No comma. "Down the street crying could be heard over the roaring storm." Comma between "street" and "crying." "We’re all alone in this world little bird." Comma between "little" and "bird." "her hopeful blue eyes, and dripping brown hair." No comma.- Aw! I love your imagery ("her hopeful blue eyes, and dripping brown hair"). The little girl (Jenna?) tugged on my heart. She reminds me so much of my cute little cousin. =) I like how you leave the reader hanging (Will they reconcile? Will he go to jail?) and at the same time you close it up nicely with a neat twist. "Paper posters fluttered as they ripped off their nails from the violent wind." Here, I'd recommend changing "fluttered" to something more sinister, because "flutter" has more happy connotations (it reminds me of butterflies rather than papers blowing in the wind). I'm really glad I could saw this on your profile and read it. It's an excellent piece. Keepy writing!
tiantian 2005-04-07 ch 1, anon.	abuseVery touching. ::tear:: I really loved it!
murphy1086 2004-10-03 ch 1,	abuseAh. That was very good Kinna. I loved it. Very different and unexpected ending, but I loved it all the same. Hehehee. Anyways, I'm leaving now. ...yes, bye bye. Your faithful reader, moi
Oath 2004-08-25 ch 1,	abusewow... just wow... Im speechless, that was such a great story and very well written! The story had much sorrow and a huge turn around in the end.. wow. I would love to see you lengthen this story instead of a one shot - it definitly has the strength to have more than one chapter. Is it a one shot? and thats just the begining? I'll keep once in a while. I really did think she had got lost in a different country so it was going to take a while for her to get back home.. maybe a couple of chapters. wink oh, please update! i love this fic.
Bigfoot111 2004-08-23 ch 1,	abusethat was really good... at first I thought the guy was her father... but brother works well too... it was kind of predictable that he was a murderer or something like that... very good... the ending was powerful ciao
Laughing Dragoness 2004-08-22 ch 1,	abusebrilliant. absolutely wonderful. very beautifully written. outstanding work!

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