eh. got that from Harry Potter: GoF ? With the mermaid picture in the perfects bathroom?

nvm.. u have probably no idea what im talk ing abt...

anyway- I like it!great Job!

~Liz

:) i like how you never told us she was a mermaid until the end. Not surprising, but ends the poem in a very sweet way :)

short and sweet, brilliant in it's own way. Though this could be made longer, the shortness of it sort of made me read the lines a couple of times and try and absorb it, even though there's not all that much to absorb.

the way you described the mermaid fits almost exactly to my 'stereotype' if you like, of what a mermaid is.

simply brilliant!

Beautifully written. It flows very nicely. Keep writing!

cute very cute

I really liketthis. It's very well written and I like the way it ryhmes. my poems hardly ever ryhme. lol. very good.

Very good for a first poem. I personally like the how you play the words, the n' thing, to make them fit your rythem better. Shakespeare did that, both for ryme and timing.
Also, I loved the final twist at the end. Most don't think of mermaids as sad for their tail. Lovely insight.

The rhyming seemed to hinder the poem more than to help it. It interrupted the flow of it. But it was still very good for a first poem.

It's sweet, with a cheerful ending.

I really like it, but not the 'n' thing!

Some adjustment could be made to some of lines to make them a little more effective (line 6 in particular), but otherwise it had a very sing-song rhthym; kind of like Shel Silverstein (I think that's his name...)

I've also been reading your Fantasy story (Threads of Twilight; I hate reviewing stories I haven't finished, hence this note). The writing style is great but I'm not far enough to comment on the solidity of the plot yet. The names are typical Fantasy; Fyrenma, Rin, Bir, Abyn'mosgoth, what have you there; not to mention the use of capital letters (Dark, Light, The Outside, The Great War, The Tree, The Egg, The Up, The Down...)- But since these elements are so commonplace I won't nitpick at them any longer. All in all, it seems like an interesting read, but now I should stop writing and find out whether it is or not.

It's quite good--my only suggestion is that instead of using "n" for "and", use "an'". It fits better with the other words you're using.

My other question is how you get the title to show up in such a large font.

thats real nice.u have a real nice way of choosing words and fixing them togehter..i love the last line it made me smile..hope u read and review some of my work..i really want to know what u think

This was simple and sweet, yet you have your own way of making all the words flow. Very good for a first try at a poem. The last sentance put a nice touch.

I love the last two lines! I disagree with you on some of your word choices but this is still better than anything I could ever write. Very nicely done!