Reviews for The Spared - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: The Spared

Imaginary Rose 2008-06-19 ch 2,	Hi! I'm reviewing as I read so just bear with my ramblings please. [...causing the small hairs on the back of her neck to stand up on end.] I like the details and the image this invokes. [...an odd dream seeded from her midnight beef sandwich.] Funny, my favorite line so far. [...nervously playing with her hands...] How is she playing with them? Wringing them? Thumb Wars? [...in your time her...] Should be 'in your time here' [Michelle's eyes flew open and she looked at her wrist.] When did she close her eyes? How did she know to look at her wrist? Did she feel something? [A smile fleshed...] Looked it up: flesh --verb-- 13. to plunge (a weapon) into the flesh. Sounds a little painful. [You will marry the last spared male...] Her husband's already picked out! [...will/to stay...] Weird break in the middle of the sentence. [Find the root of all evil...] So she's helping to make a perfect society? I find that to be hard to believe. [...stepped into the cold shower...remembered that their hot water valve...] She was already prepared for a cold shower before she remembered she was going to have to take a cold shower. [Testing the new...blinding light after them.] That can't be safe. Why is she starting a fire inside the house? [A moment later...tub, ceiling, and walls.] That's it? No scorch marks or charred smell or is that what you mean by tub, ceiling, and walls? [...she rummaged for appropriate traveling clothes...] Here's a thought, how is she supposed to wake these five others? There spread across the world, right? How is she going to travel if there is no one left, no pilots, no ship captains, no etc. Very curious. Overall a good chapter, but some questions are left unanswered.
Kinta 2005-07-15 ch 3,	Did Daemon have a dream too? Or is it up to Michelle to inform him?
CryNowLaughLater 2005-04-05 ch 3,	okay you win, you have me caught in this web you are weaving of a story. I now await your next chapter. I like the second chapter the best, it remind me of you. You know with all of the critters and such.
Sable2117 2004-08-23 ch 3,	Wow! I really like Daemon. I'm really glad you decided to post this story, it's excellent! I'm trying to think of someway you could improve it but nothing comes to mind...good job!
WindX0X 2004-08-22 ch 1,	Wow! This is a wonderful opening chapter. Grammar looks excellent, and there are hardly any typos at all. Great job! I especially liked the part about the midnight beef sandwich. ;) --Selene If you've got a sec, could you please review "Spy of the Kingdom" for me?

Return to Top