This is confusing for two reasons: first of all, because some of the ideas expressed are quite sophisticated; and secondly, because it's not tremendously well structured.

What really struck me, however, was the differences in your perspective and mine: as an Australian, September 11th didn't actually strike me or anyone I know as incredibly significant in its self. This event was a minor tragedy - very minor - when compared to what Americans have used it to justify.

So I think that your piece would benefit if the speaking persona took a step back; considered the day and its implications from a more global perspective. Human interest should never be allowed to dominate - or, in this case, overpower - the communication of some wider, more elevated meaning...