ahh very good, i like how you kept repeating "Freedom", it made it feel like an anticipating desire, which is actually what it is lol; keep up the good work!

I like this, it has a simple format but that is a good thing becuase it makes it give across the message of freedom that you are trying to give.
i like the way you go deeply into the concept that you are writing about, and use words that are very deep.
Great Job! Keep writing!
Thanks for the review too! :)
-SilverOcean