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| JaveHarron 2004-10-28 ch 1, anon. | abuseDamn! Quite a one-shot story you've got here. Reminds me of a warped version of the Sirens. |
| JD Kennedy 2004-10-20 ch 1, | abuseWow, really cool and a nice portrayal of human greed. One error? Um: 'Ina fit of jealous rage,' no space there, but that's it. Otherwise: Brilliant. But what exactly is the woman? Ah well, drop me a line sometime, C'ya. ~ JD |
| lucid-psyche 2004-10-17 ch 1, | abuse(As promised...) Very, very nice. The only little criticism/complaint I have is that in the first paragraph or so, you use a lot of prepositions. "A lot" meaning that I noticed it fairly quickly. Besides that, I have no complaints. It was quick, and still a good read. Good job! :-) |