I loved the poem it was great. It was so sad though, I think that you are great at writing poems and should keep doing so. You can try to find some of my stuff if you want, I dont have a lot up right now, but i'm working at it. One of the best ones I have (I think) is a story, Theives Guild. If you do read it then send me a review! Love your poem, i'll definitly look for more of your work!

I've forgotten how much I liked the fantasy genre. I didn't see before that you linked me in your bio ^_^ I have no idea how the thou, thee and thy terms work but they look right to me! Well done.
- Sarika

That was pretty nice, yeah. But if you don't mind, I must say that the words 'thy' and 'thou' were very much overused till it reached the point of redundancy, aye? Although it was good that you tried giving this piece a touch of whimsical archaism. Nevertheless, you could've rephrased some of the lines so as the word 'thine' could be used instead of 'thou'.
Meh. That's only me. I have an archaic sort of poem and I'm not sure about it myself.
ta, kaz