My first impression of this piece of work is that you are trying to portray a person who is dizzy with the reality around him.
You play with the idea of time, age, escapism in the for of cheating time and relieving pain. There's a part which suggest a tired person who ages to soon. It's a mixture of many idea. Sometimes it makes me feel that the person (the voice of the poet) is tossing many things in a go which reminds me of a hectic life and tight schedule.

I need to read again... in no condition to take in anothers words right now... but thank you for your feedback it is as always appreciated... I am not a serious writer... I can't re-write all you read is raw. If you want/need more... users/daenerysstorm
thanks again
k

I can relate to some of this and I relaly like the format... nicely done... one spelling thing and leaves me with only daja vu... deja vu

you reveiwed some of mine so i thought i'd return the favour D i really like this poem. it's very poignant and to the point. going through an odd phase at the moment myself makes me relate most to the lines:
"sweet lies
to put me to sleep at night"
it's so true! great talent, keep writing
Rx

oo! I like the ending when you say "I am the arch of your face seeing me for the first time". great imagery! Keep up the good work

it flows perfectly, I love it. Ive added it to my favourite stories list
Keep it up
Pamplemousse

Nice poem, it seems a little jaded though. I love it.
_ Kati