Awsome, very descriptive. My own teacher would have yelled at me for more smell, but my teacher is rude. I liked it and, I know it is a one shot, but it could make a nice piece in a story.

happy hunting,
~Midnight Predator~

This is excellent. Just the right amount of imagery, enough to be a beautiful compostion but not too much so its like "What in Grandma's piggy bank is going on?" I applaud you.