You've got a good eye for detail, Ryan, and you've really done a good job developing the character of Ben Ramsey. I was just planning on reading the first chapter, but after that I had to read the rest. Good work!

Nothing like coming on to the computer for some leisurely internet surfing and getting some good reading thrown in too.

A bit of a slow start to this chapter admittedly, but it built up enough for that to not be a factor. The amused almost cheery way he first reacts to the reflection in the mirror had me wondering if he was going a bit nutty too. It's great how you're able to put a touch of menacing into your writing and still have room for some humor.

I in particular, loved this part in particular:

Thank God, this time, sanity won the battle. It was my own miserable mug staring back at me. I ran my right hand through my hair, and the Ben Ramsey reflection ran its Ben Ramsey right hand through its Ben Ramsey hair. What a relief it was. It made me feel a lot better. The relaxed smile on my face was returned by the mirror-Ben.

But I dared not laugh at it. Not a chance in hell of that happening. I’d respect it, that’s all.

And the touch with his brother and their family at the end of the chapter gives it a touch of a high note that you can't help but feel will come crashing down.

You know, this actually comes across like an actual published book that I get to read for free on the internet. Since being on Fictionpress.com, I've read alot of bad stuff, some good stuff, even some great stuff, but in all honesty, this in three short chapters has managed to stand out as one of the best stories I've read.

Kudos, my friend, kudos. And keep it up. You've gone into my favorites, so I hope to be seeing more from you.

Another great chapter. I love the description you put into this. The simple child-like city, the blood red sky, the pounding noise, the shapeless man. Great stuff.

I really wish I had something to critique you on, but so far all I'm seeing is good.

Holy crap, this is fantastic!

I'm sorry, I know how much I hate reviews that don't do anything but give me praise without mentioning anything in particular, but I feel like I have to do it for you this once.

Fan-goddamn-f*cking-tastic!

Wow! This chapter is very good. I can picture what you've written clearly and you build up the tension well.-Write on!

I love your story. Dark, mysterious, and leaves the reader in question on what's going to happen. I can't wait till the next chapter. There's site where authors such as yourself are welcome. w.AmateurWriting.com or w.AmateurWriting.net Here writers of all kind are welcome. Most are horror authors. I myself have membership. It's free, and easy. Please at least view the site, and if you're satisfied you may join. If not then no harsh words are against you. Till next time. Good day.

Update this story, damnit!

^.^

Wow, what a piece. It's so well written. You really bring your character 'Benjamin Ramsey' to life, make him real. lol you even made my eyes leak when 'he' describes his sons death! Great work, it's added in my favourite stories - and alerts so I hope that you update soon!-Keep Writing (such a cliche but it works every time ;D )