This is retarded. She doesn't know what horses and seasons and sh*t like that are, but she goes to parties outside the house and there are freaking WINDOWS. That makes no sense and it's dumb as hell.

Also, you need to reread this entire *ing story and fix your misspellings and wrong synonyms. (You know, "to" and "too", "off" and "of" even. Seriously wtf.)

However, I guess it's a pretty cute story (except for the slave not knowing seasons or horses or sh*t like that). Seriously. Dumb.

SWEET! I loved it. It was an amazing. And fantastically well written.

This story is even better!

that was really good! i loved aiden and darren, and the ending. my only suggestion, would be that at the start when darren had sex with aiden without even knowing her.. seemed out of character. and also wen he woke up and slapped her. at every other time, he's been considerate and a gentleman.. so i can't imagine him doing something like that no matter how drunk. maybe instead, he comes into his room and he looks lustfully at her.. and aiden thinks he wants her to have sex with him so she seduces him? even if he does go through with it.. at least its more a result of circumstance since he is drunk, hence lacking proper judgement. i really liked reading this. =)

I like how you wrap up each chapter.

I like how you structured this story, too!

Oh, the ending was so good! I was kind of worried when Darren seemed so not understanding up there.

Wow, this is TWISTED.

Interesting.

!!

beautiful

A pretty quick and simple read. :)

I've said this quite a lot already, but I'll have to say it again. I do like your premise. It's pretty good. And intriguing, I like these kinds of plots.

The grammar is ok, but there is still room for improvement.

But there are a lot of things you could have expounded on.

The characters were too static, too flat. Make us really get to know them. Tell us each of their stories. Make us see what they see. Make their relationships a deeper, make them a lot more interesting. Expound, explain, have fun with them, but always make your characters coherent and true to their character.

The setting was kind of off. It wasn't clear to me at all. It was like you were indecisive about the time and place the story happened. For me, it looked like you were torn between he Regency England or sometime near there or maybe a little more recent than that(Estates, Lord, servants, slaves). But they dress like modern day people. In my opinion, it seemed like you didn't know what they wore or how they really acted in the time period/setting you originally wanted it to be. Or didn't bother with the researching that's why it was kind of messy and disordered. And your excuse is "because you just made this all up so it really doesn't have to be based on facts and reality because it's all just my imagination." Or maybe somewhere along those lines. But really, all good stories have at least a foundation from reality. The setting really was mumbo-jumbo and it was like you were indecisive about it.

You could also have vastly improved upon how you tell the story. Make it more intricate and EXPOUND. Hahaha...I say that a lot here in this review, don't I? Well, it's just because this story has so much potential, just make it a lot more sophisticated and more thought of and expound a lot more. Explain things; be descriptive and not just narrative.

But I do like the premise. Don't forget that. Maybe a little cliche but you made it your own. And if you rewrite it and make each chapters longer, as it is supposed to be because you have to explain a lot more things(and make things more intricate and not so simple), I would really love to read it again. I would probably enjoy and appreciate it a lot more. :)

Good luck and happy writing!

CUTE!

Okay, I read this whole story, and I almost didn't review, but then I thought. Wow! Everyone on this site is usually review starved. And it was a good story. So here I am reviewing. Your story was amazing. Truly it was. I read many many books and this was incredible. A few grammar errors, but nothing that made it unreadable. Good luck on any future works you may have.
Lots of Love,
Emi

So lovely, so lovely.

aww i love this story. it's so sweet. darren is so sweet!

That is such a sweet story!

great story!! hahas.. thxs!