By the way, I understand how school can get in the way of story creating. Look at me, Mr. "I havn't updated in half a year because im busy writing an epic novel, of... erm... epic.. proportions?" When really im just trying to get my way through 10th grade. (I know you seniors have it far worse) Just take it at your own pace. I think we all understand how hard creating a fictional world can be when its only something you can manage in you spare time.

Wow. I am not only enthralled, but captivated as well. Thats a first!

Ah, so you did get another chapter up! Nice.

Few spelling errors, most of the mistakes were grammatical. Not too bad, though.

Aww, it's Jinx...okay, I'll be quiet now.

One thing! There was only one spelling mistake, and I hate it when that happens to me, so I'll just point it out. You said 'piece' instead of 'peace'. Since the rest of it was right it seemed a shame. No, I'm not asking for all /my/ mistakes to be thrown back at me! Those /alone/ would be enough to write an entire book...

When you wrote the original one, how could you have possibly thought that a war between heaven and hell was unimportant?!? I wanna know what happens next!

POOR SHO!*cries*

You're right, this is quite a notch above your fanfictions. The description is well-placed and accurate, and I have a feeling that revision really did something for this story.

It's odd, though, I think that you really need to set this in another world...the characters and places in it are close enough to reality to have you simply set it in a more fantastical earth.

One small quarrel: Short chapters! But it's not such a bad thing.

Aw, poor Sho!

First a question: It's been bugging me- How do you pronounce Htrae?

Few spelling mistakes or typos, but that doesn't really matter. After all, this I saying this, and I am notorious for typos.

I've read a couple of your stories but I think this is the best.

I like how Sho thinks. You really capture the way things would be from a cat's point of view. More people should read this. It really is one of the most original things out there. I can't wait for more... so keep writing!

Well, it's definately publishing material. The literature, and the flow, is very creative. And genuine. A very original peice of work, the intelligence was swept through very clearly.

But you know, when writing a peice, there's always something like action that involves me, or an ever linger question to reading. What will happen in such and such was left. Cliff hangers were nice touched... and the war was really brought out as question. But it seems almost obvious who will win... try to draw from that so Sho is in another... anyways, again great job. Hope to see more.

-Bloody Doll-

Whoa, this is very original! It's interesting to read. Keep writing! I'd like see where this goes. It's almost like a twisted Disney movie.

AAW! No wonder he's so protective of Meredith!

Well well well...not so lazy anymore huh? My dear Ying, it sounds much better as you promised it would. Maybe we can get you to work a bit more now...wait...no...that's not possible...like trying to make Duo eat or sleep less...oh well...one can hope, can't they?