wow that was so sweet and well thought out! i really enjoyed that!

A cute start to the story...a few comments though.

First, a LOT of dialogue...try to put in more background and less talking.

Second, if she's making $50 a day working from 9-5 (which is very unusal timewise for a waitress, btw)...and we assume she's working 5 days a week...that works out to $130 a year... now since she's the head of household and has two dependents, including a tax deductable child, she's only taxed on about $5,500 of that money. That's a tax rate of about 5%, leaving her with about $12,725 a year...maybe slightly less.

If she's being paid now $10 a month by Devlin, that's LESS than she was making as a waitress and thus would not be a good deal. I would suggest upping it to either "$10 a week" or "$30 a month with a bonus of $10,0 if the woman is found before 6 months is up" or something similar.

good luck, I'm off to read more!

WHE! Hehe, I love it _

This was such a sweet story. I really enjoyed reading it. Great job on everything! I loved it!

CUTEE!

But Naomi doesn't look down on Bryn? Was really convenient. Ah well, I guess realistic endings aren't exactly what I'm looking for in a romance story. :D

THIS IS SO DEPRESSING. I really suddenly wish Evangelina to get run over by a taxi.

I like how you wrap up your chapters! Loving this story!

Wow, you're REALLY good at snagging a reader's interest! :D I love this story!

Wow; really cool way of getting them together! haha

Whoa, she has it SO bad. :(

I like your character introductions.

I wonder how it's going to work out between them.

I came across this story and I absolutley love it. Its like this book Match me if you can I read recently. You write really well. good job !

wow...

lets say that i awake till 4am to finish it.

i hv saved its 14 and 15 chapters... so its mean that u its really good

congratulation

aw man you reduced me to tears and im serious

what a sweet story

AW

-wipes away a tear-

although i suppose i AM emotional at like 3am but i just couldnt stop reading your story, wink.

i love this story! :D

Gah I'm crying! That was so beautiful..i love Devlin. I love how you've made him really rich and hot and stuff but still he isn't narrow-minded or prejudiced against Drew. Oh I love Drew..feisty and all haha. And yes, I'm aware that this review is very err..late and all but i wanted to add this story to my favourite stories, because i'm going to be reading it again and again and again..

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cheers!