 Nick H. 2005-01-05 . chapter 1The best part of this was the girl's dialogue. Hilarious, and afterwards I dumbfoundedly realize that I used to think like that. @_@The opening is a bit off, however. It's not clear whether she's talking to herself, or thinking; and if it's either of the two then it doesn't fit her character as you describe her in the rest of the story.That's really the only beef I have, besides the incredible shortness. |