 Mistress Jakira 2005-01-22 . chapter 1I really love this. The only thing I didn't like about it was the use of the word "depressing"; I just never liked it and don't feel that it's synonymous with 'sad' as it is often used. But then, you're the author. :) I know these days very well, and I think you've done a wonderful job of saying it. This is kind of an abstract poem; it tells more than it shows, but that's not always such a bad thing. I especially liked your third verse; that was the one that struck me most as perfectly worded. And your "where"s in the second and fourth verses should probably be "when"s as well. I love the addition of the prayer at the end. That's where I seek out my strength and I'm glad to find a kindred spirit in that faith. :) Lovely work. Keep writing! ~MJ |