ahh poor kitty. i hate that candy. alex is so blind. i love it please update soon!

thats a realy good story please get another chapter out on iti wanna read the rest so badman i think candys a bitch thats all i have to say lol love forever and alwaysbritt

Lacks description in parts, however, it reads OK.

[“Concerned that his manhood isn’t being fulfilled. Admit it you have always wondered what he was like in bed.”“How can you that and keep a straight face?!”“You know it’s the truth.”“He is my friend, nothing more.”“Stop denying it, I see the way you look at him.”]

compared to:

[“I’m serious Kitty. If you have EVER felt anything sexual for him, tell him.]

These lines didn't seem to match so much. Anyway.

Nice chapter but again, whilst not quite so boring, Alex doesn't seem like an important character - obviously a main one - but Kitty seems 'best'. For instance, the description of: [Alex looked at Candy as her father shook his hand and walked out of the room. He didn’t know what to say. She had made all of his dreams come true. It showed him how much she really did care. She would be there forever. He smiled and pulled her into his arms. They kissed passionately as the secretary walked in and sat the papers on the desk.] seemed to lack emotion.

Crying, aye? Bring on plot.

With parts like:

[He was here with her, but he didn’t really care anymore. It was all about Candy and she wasn’t even his girlfriend. Kitty hated her with a passion.]

and

[“Candy set up this interview for me.”“The stripper?”“She’s not a stripper.”“She has the name of a stripper.”]

it's no wonder we're going to hate Candy. Alex, so far, seems a little dull. However.. more chapters :) Nice start.

your story is awsome and you haven't updated in forever! you should keep writing! hope to see a new chapter soon! XKittieX

I really like this, it flowed easily, and not too much drama..excellent..i did notice some spelling stuff though...

i love where its going. probably like falling in love with Kitty and yeah...im dragged in.

Its a good story although you have a little of confusing details. In the beginning of Chapter 2 I believe you say Jesse. Well I don't even think you have a Jesse. Your names in it are all over the place. It needs a little bit of TLC and correcting.

no! theres gotta be more! put more on! now!!

Aw! I just ate it wen guys do that...poor Kitty. Gr8 job. I love the name Kitty! Its really cute!

alex is a jerk; friendships are far more important...he'll realize when candy the slapper emerges as one, lol...come on, thats where its going, right?

Ok really confusing. I couldn't tell if she liked him or not...or just didn't like his g/f. Ahh well...

shiti can tell i'm going to be addicted to this story~sparrowsredrose