Hardly the uplifting tale I needed before work...lol. Seems like Plath or Wolfe syndrom to me. I bet that's how they felt. I hope it's not how you feel. Although, it could be interperated a completely different way. No less reassuring.

I wonder that all that nothing is the dullness of society and the closedness of people's minds, locking in that poor figure trying to find an identity and reaching it but for a moment ("her") and being overwhelmed by what lies beyond the monotony of every day life. It was perhaps far more safe, indeed comforting, to be locked in with no identity and become 'it' once more.

Well?