This is interesting. I like what you're saying but the flow got a little awkward to me at some points. Still, what you're saying is really cool, and the writing is clever. Thanks for the review!

Nice wording, I could actually see a pretty clear picture in my head. I like it.

aweome analogy. there is so much emotion in there! keep it up!

very nice )

i really liked this poem and also why. i could practically feel the emotions.

Nice. Provides vivid imagery here. This is a great poem.

This was very good.

That is a really good poem... a little creepy but cool. Keep writing!