Bravo! It was very interesting.

I could feel the rythym of the poem in her voice. gah, you're awesome!*loves*

was reading through some of your stuff, and realized how much i miss your writing.

This was good, but the rhyme scheme is way off in the beginning. It seems like near the middle you got the hang of the poem, but the beginning... I like the theme, though, it's written differently than most poems of the same idea. It's good.

i absolutely LOVE the rhyme scheme here.

I like this stuff. It's so lovely that I can picture it in my mind - everything from the scene to the raw emotions playing across every line. Keep on writing.