that hit my conscience.. hit my conscience real bad.. hehe

I tried to start smoking for that reason. But it was difficult to get addicted. Heh. Nice job. The last section whatever was very powerful.

This is a very interesting poem.I must admit that I do like it.It is true smoking is a very bad habit and it is very hard to stop, ofcourse I wouldn't kow because I've never tried it.Knowing myself I'd be too weak to quit.Furthermore I would like to thank you for your review on 'What's Going On?' and you are right,I shouldn't remove it just because someone might get offended.Thank you.

Funny man, very enjoyable...

Great job. I love you rhyming scheme, not traditional by any means but it was just right for this poem.

Hm...I like your meter, but again it also flows in a very poetic/prose fashion, and not just straight "poetry" and yet it rhymes as well so it's not completely free/blank verse. I like this, and your alternative point of view. Thank you for your words, and keep writing.

i like the different points of view.. nice job

bravo! it's getting to the point severe,

where every private pleasure is so bad,

labeled bad for your health or your neighbors,¿—btw did you know that . . . causes dire,

spasms in 10 year old rats exposed,

to megadoses of vitamin P?

¿or that masturbation is the real root,

of parkison's disease early onset?

between the left and the right they've got you,

in a sandwich of dilemmas oddly,

do or don't,—¡either way you're surely damned!

Ooh, this is a really nice one. Your pacing is excellent too (not to steal a comment you left in your review) but it really is! I enjoy the paragraph structure and yet it still has this great rhthym. I could just imagine someone reading this out loud. At a smokey coffeehouse, haha. (Also, the maxilla is your upper jaw bone. I had jaw surgery this summer on both my upper and lower jaw bones, ugh!) Great poem!

good! I like your train of thought, and how you seem to be holding a conversation with another person that is hardly mentioned. Two sided dialogue, but only one side shows. That's awesome! great work!

so true, great work, thank you for sharing

i really enjoyed this. i'm also responding to your review. thanx for it and yes the ending was quite a surprise i made it like that to show how people automatically think they know everthing when they know nothing. and i have the same exact view on religio as you hence my pen name Tha G.0.D. u are so lucky to get to go to japan. i'll go when i get out of high school. could u please review the resr of my work and anything by Mischevious Productions. by the way do u like dizzee rascal i seem to be the only amerikan who knows let alnoe likes him?

-Tha G.0.D.