FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Super Scholar 2008-02-16 ch 1,  | abuseI liked your formal style I also read your essay on feminsim...it was interesing but I didn't like your style in that one. It was too informal and conversational. |
| T.J. Emmet 2006-11-23 ch 1, | abuseMe again. And this is the last pointless review I give you I promise. Good stuff, as always. However, just a bit of criticism. I haven't read any of your other fiction, so I don't know if your style has changed since writing this, but to me the tone sort of alienates the reader in its intellectuality. You've got such a wit and earnestness in your essays that somehow didn't come across in your prose, because the writing is so stylised and heightened. Maybe try mixing it up a little. Have some shorter sentences. Describe some things in less detail. Don't be so formal. Just a thought. But otherwise, very nice work. |
| J-fr0 2005-09-11 ch 1, | abuseI recently went to a funeral whom my friend's father's wife had just died. He almost reiterated what you just said. Coincidence, eh? |
| gangster-dolly 2005-04-05 ch 1, | abuseAwe, how very sweet. Yet another great descriptive piece from you. Good work. --Emily |
| Aryon O Huine Child 2005-03-26 ch 1, | abuseOh. So heartwarming. And the way you describe the girl... reminded me a lot of myself, except I have dark blonde hair. I loved this. That's all I can say. It's such a small, beautiful piece. Good work. |