I liked it, very short but lyrical and pretty images with the more depressing ones. "Waning like a dying star." I liked that line especially. I can never write good poetry, and am in awe of your skill. Lovely.

oh, dear.

this is wonderfully written...

but so sad!

like, this is depressing, really depressing...but don't get me wrong, it's very good, for that! well done!

Seems very lilting and musical, well written indeed. I felt that the 3rd-last line broke the poetic continuity of it a little with the word "choking", but otherwise the images you evoke and your choice of language are wonderful. Good job!