FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| method acting 2006-03-21 ch 1,  | abuseExcellent language. I especially enjoyed your last two lines. Caps (or lack there of)...intentional? I like it. It makes you think. Actualyl I'm not sure if perhaps this is common in all of your work, maybe you just can't find taht damn capslock key, but I like it in this piece. Fine job. |
| Kitsune Illustrated 2005-04-18 ch 1, | abuseBeautiful. |
| SilverSpinner 2005-04-08 ch 1, | abuseMy favorite line is, "I'm loving you in fear / in sickness and in health and I don't know which one this is..." Ooh, and I also like, "kill the lights so I don't have to see myself." The way it rhymes in some lines but not others is very interesting. Great poem. I love your work. |
| Made in U.S.A. 2005-04-07 ch 1, | abusegah i don't know what to say i love it all really. keep writing :D |
| asyousaid 2005-04-02 ch 1, | abuse"you resist me although you may have missed me" is such a wonderfully flowing line, and everything is beautiful! You create a world where beauty means something, its really inspiring. |
| twenty-second seduction 2005-03-30 ch 1, | abusethis poem so complete.it's awe-inspiring. it's going on my favorites. |
| catseyeview 2005-03-30 ch 1, | abuseThis last stanza is explosive, overall though, I love this work! |
| makeshift parachute 2005-03-30 ch 1, | abuseyou are a writing goddess. |
| Je-Nie-Dieu 2005-03-30 ch 1, | abuseThe twenty-fifth line is my favorite. You know, this poem makes me want to go back to Jules Verne. Don't know why. |
| clockwork kiss 2005-03-29 ch 1, | abuseW.o.o.o.w. This is -so- wonderful. This, I think, is my favorite piece of yours besides "x". I love the imagery (so original and striking), and the flow with the sporradic rhyming and the repitition of a few keys words... wow. The title sums it up great, especially considering your -gorgeous- ending. I am in absolute love with the last 5 lines. "love is what the sirens sang while the streetlight prowlers wept" ah. i love that. it catches you short while you read through and really makes you think. I adore this. It is beautiful. |
| Nobody-n-Particular 2005-03-29 ch 1, | abuseThis is fascinating. |
| Sharakinpaix 2005-03-28 ch 1, | abuseWow! This has definitely got a Borges tingle to it, and thank the stars it's written by someone of our time! I love your title, alchemist, and how it ties into your last line: "and i deserve everything that comes back to me in the end." Whether to be concerned about *Fate* seems to be a big theme here. Whereas mortar is dead, the ground is alive and shaken, like love. I'm no poetry expert, but gawsh you must have taken a long time layering so much meaning in! Hope you don't mind if I randomly post a question on a phrase, cuz it is just sizzling with meaning! P.S. Thank you so much for your kind review! |
| Crazy In 88 2005-03-28 ch 1, | abuseThat's funny. I enjoyed this- very cool and everything. You should become a songwriter cause I could just hear a track in the background._yin |
| shola 2005-03-28 ch 1, | abuseWow. That's powerful stuff |
| i was a postcard 2005-03-27 ch 1, | abuse"cut the stars from the sky so the light can't tamper with my easy emotions" I never get sick of your words. How do you keep doing it? I love the torn beauty of this...so broken and tattered, yet wonderful. |