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| Akhenaten 2005-06-18 ch 1,  | abuseI'm laughing... just kidding. Nice poem, I guess... the thing is, you can prove there is oxygen, you can't prove there is no god you have tot aike it on faith |
| Mistress Jakira 2005-05-30 ch 1, | abuseI like the end...hmm, very good point, hm? I have much faith and am certainly not offended by this. Insightful! ^_^ |
| mistressKC 2005-05-29 ch 1, | abusetrue |
| Clap Clap Raise Your Hands 2005-05-29 ch 1, | abusei like the last 2 verses most, especially the very last line, its very hard hitting and i like the point you make about oxygen x weasel within x |
| Somnia 2005-05-15 ch 1, | abuseI'm coming! Good poem, some of your others (ie "four dancers") were more "poetic, but they all touched the truth. Brilliant. |
| Proud to be an American 2005-05-13 ch 1, | abusereally good poem!! I really like your style of writing, it has a nice flow to it. ~*Toni*~ |
| Ahemait 2005-05-09 ch 1, | abusewow, very awesome poem and idea. i really liked this and th ending was also well done. i agree with the idea and you stated in a very cool way. favourites... |
| Sarah-Brighteyes 2005-04-20 ch 1, | abuseI love this poem. the last stanza...no, the last line is like bam in your face. Look at the truth behind tha laughter. I loved this. Beautiful and compelling one to think about their own relationship with God. Good piece. Bravo to you. |
| l057 1n51d3 2005-04-17 ch 1, | abuseinteresting. ive thought about this before too. good message to get across to others. t.s. |
| Adonia Chesser 2005-04-17 ch 1, | abuseReligion isn't what God made, man made it to get to God. All God want's from us isn't reilgion, but our beliefe in him that he died for us, and our commitment to him. I agree with your poem, and liked it very much. Just remember that christianity isn't a reiligion, but a relationship. |
| CW-nerd-12 2005-04-05 ch 1, | abuseooh. I like this littl e piece. Some suggestions, though: use another word besides "get **." it's un-poetic and sticks out. Also, use some more poetic devices, some more metaphors or similes or conctere images or something, especially towards the end, where the concrete images kind of fall off. Anyway, this is one of your better poems. Keep writin'! |
| PirateGrrl 2005-04-01 ch 1, | abuseThis is definitely one of my favorites of yours. I like your analogy: belief in air, can't see it, but it _must_ exist. The last line was very powerful. You have great talent in poetry. Fantastic job with this |
| angyal 2005-03-30 ch 1, | abuseWow, that is absolutely true, I like this poem. It shows the truth behind religion. Keep writing. |
| His Only 2005-03-29 ch 1, | abuseAww that was so sad! I felt so sorry for you during the whole poem. It was written well though. It had a nice ryhthm to it. But it was still sad. Depressingly sad ;( I'll pray for you that you may feel what we Christians feel and that way understand. God Bless! |
| and flowers 2005-03-29 ch 1, | abusehum, i like it a lot. most definitely the third stanza. i wouldn't have thought to relate to God like that. nice job. i liked it. would you mind if i put the third stanza on my profile for this website? |