beautiful. I've gone through similar experiences myself (the unbelieving part, not the crash, thank the Lord). the ending is awesome. Just how I have felt. This is a beautiful piece.

I only got a little confused on where she was in the beginning, I thought she was at school, and then at the end I realized she was outside the hospital, so maybe work with that a little. and the gruesome detail of the crash didn't seem to quite fit, distracted me from the main theme of the piece, and didnt seem like something a teacher would completely describe to a student, so maybe tone that down just a little.

but otherwise, I only notices a couple of punctuation slips and your sentences and paragraphs flowed really well. good job, well done, gold star. smiles!

hey... loved the story. just one thing- the beginning is confusing, the sentences are a bit hard to follow. Otherwise, it's great.

keep it up!

its a great story! to bad its only one chapter! update soon please!

This was so good. I enjoyed it so much. You did a great job on this. :)