I *LOVE* that last stanza (?). That is one of the best things I've read. I normally am not a huge fan or poetry, but I adore that. Great job, maybe write more in a similar fashion?

that was alluring...great job!

this was very good, i liked the last stanza it was very good. it could also be a bit bigger.~infection~

I completely agree with you, the rhyming scheme is cool. I loved reading this :)