FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Eirien 2005-06-23 ch 1,  | abuseWow, really impressive and touching. The conversational tone interwoven with images and showing a good analytic ability to see through persons and emotions all work together into a really good poem. Sad and makes one think. |
| Scripture 2005-05-15 ch 1, | abuseAmazing again. You are a great poet, and it's really comforting to know that I am not the only one who writes long poems :) |
| SilverSpinner 2005-04-27 ch 1, | abuseIt seems almost fragmented. It's wonderful, it feels so real to me. |
| Joewhatever 2005-04-26 ch 1, | abuseTHEY give you HOPE when they SAY maybe someday but just not TODAY Agh. Spoke perfectly right there. That one line. Perfect. Apart from that, there were some other nice, relatable (is that a word? lol) lines here too. It had a different feel than your other poems as well, more conversational, a bit less...complicated. I think that's the word I want. It was different, interesting, and overall I found it quite intriguing and so very easy to relate to. That one line mentioned above...gee **, how many times, huh? O.o;; Anyway, nicely written. |
| The Melissa Occult 2005-04-26 ch 1, | abuseDestruction brings evolution. It's true, there could be a human subspecies in the world right now that differs only in their brain pattern. maybe they're the ones who are given medications by the big docotrs, maybe they're the future of the human race. That's kind of freaky. They're not like us, but they are... so odd. |
| APersonAndAHalf 2005-04-25 ch 1, | abuse"THEY give you HOPE when they SAY maybe someday but just not TODAY"I love that. I really do. Love the whole thing. You will forever rock!~A. Person |
| Sharakinpaix 2005-04-23 ch 1, | abuse"magnitude of your gravity" Omg, I loved that line. Two things I would never expect to fit together so well. And "because most of all, you are lonely!" Definitely something the heart cries out, because it's the personna (persona?)'s murmurs that escape them. I love how ironic it is that they see the personna as an egoist when it is they who assume she is a hopeless romantic. Definitely one of my fav. fictionpress poems. Keep up the good work! |
| Made in U.S.A. 2005-04-23 ch 1, | abusei love the way the words are scattered and everything about this. beautiful really. keep writing :D oh and this is my new pen name i got bored with firstkissattheexecution. |
| Aslan Israel 2005-04-23 ch 1, | abuseI love the seemingly scattered words and phrases. Perfect ending. Brava. |
| if sighing 2005-04-23 ch 1, | abuselovely (horrible comment I know, but I'll be back. It might take awhile though) |
| shola 2005-04-23 ch 1, | abuseVery well portrayed, there's a real pain visible here |
| i was a postcard 2005-04-22 ch 1, | abusemurmur is actually one of my favorite words, and this poem proves why. "maybe we're all schizophrenic here, or only just you." |
| Infection 2005-04-22 ch 1, | abuseloved the theme, it was great. |
| stutter something profound 2005-04-22 ch 1, | abuseman, this is what i felt all throughout high school. and still kind of feel it to this day . . . the anger in this made me smile. not because i revel in another's pain, but because, "wow, this is exactly how i felt! get out of my brain!" lame review :( |
| Je-Nie-Dieu 2005-04-22 ch 1, | abuseyourself is the only one that can hear you murmur off into the great jumbled beyond Jumbled's the exact word I would use. See, everybody, there is good angst poetry on this site! (though I can't relate to it fully because it's about a girl) |