awesome last lines!!

"To every vein in my body. To every vessel in my heart. To every tear from my eyes. Nothing was heard. Nothing was seen"

that was just gorgeous. ^^ write on!

...Amazing... You have truly captured a part of reality expertly in this poem. A few grammar mistakes is all I can see wrong. Beautifully written. =)

You're right, it is pretty different. However, to me, it is a very good different. Not bad at all. Keep it up