I would say more description, but from the old hard-boiled stuff I've read, this fits right in with the genre. Makes for entertaining prose, as you have demonstrated here. I honestly felt you could have expanded upon the tone, but as it stands, it's still very good. Can't wait to see more stuff from you.

Brian, think you could read "The Group Code Named Monteverdi"? I'd appreciate a review of what you think up to this point. Thanks. :)

-Steven