Wonderful. I'm glad I remembered this story after vanishing for a while.

Ah. A wonderful conclusion to a fascinating story. It's something I can read many times, yet only begin to comprehend the complicated symbolism. I am honored that you would share this bit of yourself with someone you don't even know. :)

Lovely. Absolutely lovely. I do so enjoy reading your writings. :)

I love this. The language and metaphors are beautiful, as well as your use of repetition. This has such a mystical, dreamy feeling to it. ...I want to be able to read this to my children some day, and that's the only way I can say how wonderful I find this story.

Okay, so I figure I'll be somewhat useful this go-around. XD

"And that is where the blood-blossem comes from, the rose that will bloom only in deepest winter."~Typo in "blossom," I think. It would be so cool if there were a rose that blooms in winter. :)

"And the song of the sisters bore her up and bore her onward, but did not bear her home. For she bore no gift save her own song."~I think you used the verb "bear" one too many times for it to keep its force. My suggestion is to change the verb in the second sentence, but you can do as you like, of course. :)

"And eyes as green as the jade that lurks in the heart of a glacier calmly surveyed her weary form, and he offered no assistance."~Oh, cool eyes. :) Do you think it would work better if you said "but he offered no assistance"? You're using "and" a lot, heh. It makes for an interesting style!

"He was tall, and slender as the column of ivory and and ice that behind him yearned towards the sky..."~Oh noes! Attack of the typo! Flee! ::cough::

"But what the price paid for that greatness, none can say."~Hunh. You started a dependent clause with "what" but never added a verb.

And the only other things I see are couple more typos...blasé stuff. :P

Oh! I love that you give us the names of the places at the -end-. I love the symbolism. :)

"And the wisest may watch, but the wanderes know."

'Wanderers' being mispelled there.

I like how the Dark Queen doesn't speak, or rather, you don't put what she says in quotes, yet you still tell the reader exactly what she's saying.

Oh! I like this veryvery much. :) The symbolism is fascinating, and new.

There's one little bump I noticed, in this latest chapter, actually. In the sentence: "There was little respite, and even littler healing." "Littler" should be "less," I think. Comparative form of the adjective and all that.

I look forward to seeing more of this story. :)

This is very good. I love the archaic writing style; it is very intune with the content. Keep it up, as I will continue to read. -Elsey

M... Tastes like allegory.

You work repetition into your writing very well, I've noticed.

A good begining. The language sounds like it's being read out of a book of fairy tales, which fits the story quite well.