cute, but it felt like a first draft, perhaps? BEcause it's a very cute plot and it has a lot of potential. consiter playing around with POVs, getting a lot deepin into the characters, and definately extending it.

if you do, please email me so i can read it again!

I love a happy ending! Good plot line, but I think that the point of view was a little confusing. Other than that I loved it!

It was a great story and you seem to be a great writter but I think you need to come out of your shell a bit.I think the story would've been more interesting if it was written in maybe first person format.