I thought that it was very well written overall. However, your dialouge seemed a bit, flat.

The story appears to be interesting, and I like the dyanmic between the two people. The girl seems to have a strong personalitly, but so far the boy seems to be a pretty flat character.

Try to show more and tell less.

Not bad at all. Some interesting chracters and what looks to be an interesting world.

The bit at the end about the bubbles and islands really felt like an infodump though. It didn't fit in the flow of conversation.