Reviews for dark side of the moon

Reviews For: dark side of the moon

sunscraped. 2005-06-10 ch 1,	abuseHeh, wow, I could never write this well, dreams included... You're so eloquent and discriptive. And that generally means that I can't seem to find anything wrong with what you wrote so this will end up being just like what the resto f the review whores on this site would write: "lyke, good job! keep writing!" With a few misspellings in there I can't bring myself to write... Is that title purposefully related to Pink Floyd ?
mezzie 2005-06-08 ch 1,	abuseI have been heart-yearning and mind-hungry for a poem like this for too long. So first off, THANK YOU for writing this and letting us read it.There is so much to say about this piece. Your intricacy and deftness with the words and images is reminiscent of alleppine's (and we know how good alleppine is) but entirely unique to your own style. If you hadn't entwined the image-language so well this poem would have felt disconnected and like too many thought branches going in separate directions - but that doesn't happen at all, you twine the verses together so well with your word choice. The beginning image of "starblind-ignorant" sets a great tone, a sense of blinded not by darkness but by too much light. It reminded me also of how you see 'stars' when you rub your closed eyes. You begin the recurring impression of a cold landscape that feels like the artic or like the frozen wastes of the moon (hence.. dark side of the moon) with "ice-age stars" although "sickle moon" also contributes based on your title. You go on to use "frost", "winter", "foreign land", "hoarfrost", "harsh" to carry that sense of the landscape throughout the piece. You also use a great variety of words that denote complexity and tapestry-like qualities that I really appreciated - "latticework", "spider", "lace", "maze", "nebula" - the recurrence of these do a huge part in tying your verses together and keeping that on the edge clarity of voice.I love what you've done in the second verse, taking the foreign cold landscape image you've given us and melding it with the idea of photos, and you use "nighttime betrayals in the open sunlight", "exposed" and "developed" to further remind us. At the end of the second verse it is like you are the photographer intrigued by what you have caught on your camera film "a mystery for me to pick apart". So cool. Oh, and did you mean ichorous in the sense of the gods veins or in the sense of a discharge from a wound? It seems that either would still fit with rest. Regardless, the word sits wonderfully on the tongue when reading.I thought the second last verse could have easily felt inserted and awkward because it was kindof a departure from your other thoughts but it didn't at all because of some key points that tied it firmly ie/ using "light-studded" called back to the beginning and "starblind", and bolding "it is never enough" gives a great focus pinpoint effect that is culminant and lends unity to the verse. you also tie in the jewelry image to the previous verse so it all ends up fitting great.And, the best part of the whole piece is the last verse. It is perfect perfect perfect. Never ever change it. It sweeps all that you have said before it into a single encompassing thought and it is the best ever. ever! it takes the poem from thoroughly intriguing to completely outstanding.Sorry I wrote so much, but I just had to let you know how much I enjoyed reading this, how appreciative I am of your skilled use of language. btw I am keeping this poem. cause it is that cool! mezzie
Aslan Israel 2005-06-08 ch 1,	abuseBeautifully haunting and full of mystery. Your last stanza really brought it all out; was the best. Brava.
Cyssel 2005-06-07 ch 1,	abuseWonderful. Especially loved the last stanza's "nebula of deja vu". Your poetry never fails to excite me.
thank you thoughtful 2005-06-06 ch 1,	abusemy god, this was so wonderfully written! all things included such as smooth streamline flow, word use and the altogether plot. simply amazing. you rock!
Nobody-n-Particular 2005-06-05 ch 1,	abuseWhat gorgeous and profound imagery, lingering in the mind's eye with a power beyond recognition. You have a mastery of words, most certainly. I love the title, one of my favorite albums, and love the motif of darkness.
poetic abortion 2005-06-05 ch 1,	abusebeautiful work, the poem expresses love so elgantly and beautifully. well done! ^_^ !~* noelle *~!

Return to Top