im digging this, i got a mess of an image making a statement...which is probably not the one you were going for, but whatever, i enjoy it, pretty sweet vocab going on here too, nicely done

...Wow, I feel almost insecure with the severity of your work Im feeling, it's sortof beyond criticism, it's more like the feeling you get from it, I get a picture actually, Im seeing a 40ish bohemian woman outside the cafe that she can't afford, a cigarette dangling from her worm, south hollywood, blow-job lips. she's dressed in rags intentiaonlly, getting her artist-on. She's watching from behind the gates, looking into the outside deck of the cafe, where vintage foreign niggers play with these culture hungry middleaged women and exotic instrumnents, the bohmeian woman is pleased, though she dosnt have to be part of that trash, she's just not thinking though, your thinking for the mindless beautiful scum of streets. I adore it! -Coon

wow...this is unique, never read anything quite like it. very striking and effective your choice of words strung together to create a very odd but cool atmosphere. love: "high-impact plastic mesh-cigarette breath" wicked stuff.

Great poem.

loved the wording of this, very neat and original. a refreshing sight, I liked the poem overall. it has its charm and humorous light to it. well done.

!~* noelle *~!

I loved the wording and vocabulary in this. Although, as previously mentioned, a bit inaccessible for 'the casual reader'...not sure if I fit into that, but I liked it nonetheless.

cyberpunk. that is a cool word.

though, all over my head. makes me think of starbucks. I hate starbucks though.

Eh? A bit inaccessible for the casual reader. Are you trying to imitate Chaucer, whose every verse had to be annoted to be comprehensible?