FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| elasticbobaturtle 2006-03-01 ch 1,  | abuseGreat word choice and style. There's a nice voice that carries throughout the entire piece; good write. |
| Eirien 2005-06-20 ch 1, | abuseWow, this is really good. Your diction and the whole atmosphere remind of Eliot's poem and style, whixh is really an accomplishment, especially since you say you hardly know the Eliot poem yourself. The emphasis on the "animal instincts" and the dreary, grey night atmosphere, the languid, half-mocking tone and the intellectual images are very Eliotesque. Great piece. |
| Sorrowful Dreams 2005-06-16 ch 1, | abusethis is really good. I like the experimenting you're doing. it's turning out great every time. ~Sorrow~ |
| peaceman4ever 2005-06-13 ch 1, | abusethis blew me away...Bravo! |
| underminingfaith 2005-06-13 ch 1, | abuseI get the image of noise and bright lights against a dark sky after reading this - I'm not sure if I interpreted it correctly, but I liked it and I can relate. |
| Aquafied 2005-06-12 ch 1, | abuseyour inspirations to write amaze me in the way that i probably should look at thing more poeticly. i love it so much, i am inspired to go look up that poem that you based it on. |
| Munchin 2005-06-12 ch 1, | abuseneat oh. lines I liked -"foot-prints and psuedo-names"-"the caffeine-cover of the sleepless"well I don´t know if we can define them as lines but things or words I liked. This piece is interesting. i like how you bounced off a song. |
| Lucid Nonsense 2005-06-11 ch 1, | abuseI really liked that, the descriptions are lovely |
| randomunknown 2005-06-11 ch 1, | abuseTrying to write this review I realise how hard its going to be to tell you how AMAZING that was. Lots of lines felt as if they were speaking directly to me, I could relate so well not to the topic overall, but the individual thoughts within it. I especially loved "the hems of my trousers lifted from puddles that chill rising into wind around my ankles" - it was just beautifully written. The whole poem brought up so many thoughts at the same time. Just WOW. I can't read it enough! |
| Nobody-n-Particular 2005-06-11 ch 1, | abuseSo undefining, the edges of thought blurred by feeling. The repitition feels like soft whispers from the heart, esp. at the end with the "so young." Reminded me of Clarise Starling as she whispered in response to whether the lambs would stop screaming "I don't know, I don't know." Beautiful. |