FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| The Random Witness 2005-06-29 ch 1,  | abuseWow! You kept me captivated for the whole read...great imagry i could see it all! I like these lines best.."Cold reaches out and grabs you Yanking your shoulder Forcing you to turn..." ~TRW |
| icantread, itmightbescary 2005-06-23 ch 1, anon. | abusei have not read this |
| Emily 2005-06-23 ch 1, anon. | abusethat was amazing! absolutly amazing! i really have nothing bad to say about it at all! i love the line "as fire stares you in the eye." very very god! |
| duh 2005-06-20 ch 1, anon. | abusei liked this one the best (other than deranged one)lol god job |
| Cemetary Gates 2005-06-20 ch 1, | abuseThis is very interesting. But it could be a lot more with more imagery since it is describing an actual nightmare, or something to the equivalent of it. I.e., instead of simply stating "Wishing, Hoping praying/For it to end.", give the reader a reason why it must end. _Show_ the reader that it is horrible. Vivid imagery is perfect for this. Otherwise, good job, and keep writing! |