wow i really like this, you really captured how she was feeling and what he was doing to her. Great job

Wow! Awesome job. It reminds me of the song Pretty Baby by Vanessa Carlton... if you haven't heard it, look up the lyrics. My favorite line is, "I’m drawn to you. And you’re good at exploiting my weakness. You can make me whimper or growl with just a look. You’re good at it. You offer me smiles that come from the heart, and then lash out at me, just giving me one more reason to think that you’re heartless." Totally potrays your feelings. :D Great piece.

Yeh! it was really good. YOu know i wrote my own poem based off of this? Like the lines that I gave you, and what You already had? I was tempted to put it up here, be like, Hey! Ihelped write this, so this is my own poem version thingy of it,but yeah. It was good! I'm very proud of you... *snicker snicker* Cya!