Writtings are thouroughly artistic. Mixing dialouge with descriptions :D

Reading this makes me feel like theres a voice inside my head, which means this is going in my favorites :D KEEP WRITTING MUHAHAHAHAH!

good job... u said be critical though so i'm gonna come up with sum really picky complaints lol... in the fifth line, i don't think 'inflicting' was the best word choice... maybe 'causing' would have flowed better... hm... okay, that's all i can think of... i loved the ending, especially the part where you said 'but in this life, how can i live on?'... great job, keep up the good work...

well written and very strong... keep writing

Good!