Beautiful song.

Twilight Starr

Nice imagery, thoughtful.

nice imagery, 'a glass full of tears' exquisite )

This was beautiful! I adore this style of writing. Keep it up.

Even though you're allowed to play with sentence structure in poems, your lines don't really seem to fit together. You need to give them something to make them all continous parts of a whole rather than one line, then a totally unrelated line, then another. . .