awesome, though I think you could have added a few more commas or periods for effect and phrasing. Great job still. -EarthTouch

I really love this poem. It sounds personal, and I can relate to it so much. awesome job with the phrasing, and I'll try to review your other stuff too. I'm just so busy with school and all. Good luck, and cheers!

gee midge, depressign much? good work though, and nice imagery with the bracketted bits =)

zo

hee hee hee =) ^^; aww, i love it! now my knitting has even more purpose =)

you're so cute, midge, =Dzo

I really dislike when people leave bad reviews as if they know all the skill to writing.

Writing was never meant to be judged. The soul fact in a story is that the writer may craft it anyway he or she desires. They are like a puppeteer, controlling the strings. It can only be their decision and their decision alone as to what might happen and how to tell their story. Same goes for poetry. However, once in a while a critique is good.

Your poems are okay. They are lacking something though. They flow; once in a while rhyme . . . Just there's not much deep feeling. Stories anyone can write. But writing anything well, takes deep, deep thought and feeling. Every word should be looked at and challenged and should be elegant. I'm not sure if I'm getting my point across, or if there is any understanding. However, your poems seem as if you just spit them out, without much originality or deep thought. Now, deep thought isn't how much time you take writing it. It's how you craft each word . . . carefully thinking out each word you place on the piece of paper.

Even if you discard this review and don't care, just think about this. Poems should be like snow. And a line from "Queen Christina": The snow is like a white sea, one could go out and be lost in it . . . and forget the world.

Well, keep up the work and good luck. I really do love reading anything anybody writes. Sorry this is so long. I don't like reviews that just say "good job." What do people achieve from those? But thanks for the read. And feel free to delete this review if you dislike it in anyway.

wow..sad yet awesome =)

"You're Losing" was ... slightly mediocre, to be honest. I mean, the topic has been done a hundred times over, and for a poem like that to be excellent, it has to be twice as excellent as everyone selse's. Best: You’re always tired, drooping,

and your smile wears thin.

You tell me that you eat,

but what I ask is: when?' Worst: 'the guys ** like they’re whores', which breaks with the rest and reminds me too much of the 'boys are cheats and liars' game. It's hardly the worst I've read (it can't even touch it with a hundred foot pole), but it's not the best I've read either.

Claustrophobia much? :P 'My mind wanders without paths' is a definite keeper, and the last sentence clinched it. Very good. :)

This one had a nice tone of exhasparation - I liked the 'I can't fill your mouth with words' part. The 'feel pain and joy' part felt slightly out of place, and seemed a bit too melodramatic for my liking. Otherwise, very nice!

Angsty. Gave me bad enough mental images for nightmares, too. The whole thing made me feel slightly sick, which is a good thing, I suppose; it means the poem is working properly. Pungent indeed...

... well, that was confusing. I didn't like the repetetive 'she is a cruel friend', because it got a bit annoying. The first two lines set the mood nicely for the rest of the poem. So, overall, it's an okay poem, but Tower was better.

It seems like I've been getting a bit obsessed with poetry lately. Oh well. This one was nice, especially the 'and eventually he rides away

to another day,' part, which was very ... digable. I liked the general feeling of independence and the nice kind of loneliness. And the stubborn girl power, too, at that.

Reviews previously submitted for Dead:

ScarletDreamer 2006-04-06 ch 1, signedone word. beautiful. OK, two words. bittersweet. OK, three words...Beautiful, bittersweet, and saddening.Such an amazing piece of poetry! Keep up the great work :)(*ScarletDreamer*)Confused-Mind 2005-11-30 ch 1, signedgreat imagery. were powerful word choices. Great Job!girlx-unpredictable 2005-11-19 ch 1, signedl0lz. Category: LifeTitle: Deadha ha.erhm, woah. so real, almost like ur writing from experience? god i hope not. love the vivid discriptions and theme. keep writing!skywriter 2005-11-18ch1, anon.midge, are you unhappy? because u have a lot of sad poetry. good poetry, but sad all the same =) no, i like this, its nicely written good workzo

Previous reviews submitted for Deficient:

girlx-unpredictable 2005-11-18 ch 1, signedl0lz. interestin reasons for dysfunction. i love it. keep writing!~EmzBJ Worth 2005-11-17 ch 1, signedThis one struck me as really good, I don't know why. Just that it sounded like it belonged in my high school english text...BlueDragon11 2005-11-17 ch 1, signedO.O WOAH! That's exactly what I think (about myself of course...I don't know you...)! I keep thinking that if I have a healthy diet, I would all of a sudden get an A in all my subjects. And then I think there's something wrong with me...but then with me (I don't know about you), I realized I'm just a lazy, pessimistic procrastinator.Keep on writing!skywriter (zo) 2005-11-17ch1, anon.aw, cute. i think ur perfect

Previous reviews submitted for Bored of Me:

sunday night sky 2005-10-25 ch 1, signedaww this is a really sad poem :( really well written, and really touching *relates*