so sincere, i luv it

Your sis in Christ,

Jay

Freaky...I was just thinking that today...freaky.

Great job with descriptive words. Keep it up.

To be honest: the vocab really is repetitive and message simple. Not that it is a bad message, just simple and plain. Nothing creative. Lines like "You're my sun and moon/You're the evening and morning star to me" don't flow. I think the line that showed the most potential was "Your bright smile and sparkling words are like jewels to me" because of the images and description. Good poetry paints a picture and includes deeper emotion than this. Transform plain lines like "When I feel Your presence, my hear soars" into images and this will be a better write. Keep writing for Him. God Bless.

that was great! i really liked it!

Lightning Princess

I LOVE IT! it's so true... i've thought of most of this stuff a million times but i've never been able to get it out. you made me want to actually start writing again too...anyways... awesome job!

*Lauren

i liked it alot; very honest and descriptive. keep writing!

Good descriptive language. Nice poem, but I thought you used "you" a little too much. It would have been cool if every line started with you, but I felt too many did. Other than that it's a really good poem. Good job!