kind-a weird, i admit i skipped the beggining, but i get the idea. but why kill the rest? Maybe u should start yoga ;)

I'm not quesy, or faint hearted, but put it this way... a little too bloody,kinda dark, has a unreadable meaning. I didn't get it. I sorta whizzed through it though.

Hmm...this is interesting.

Although, I think it should be expanded into a novel and not a cramped little one-shot. Because it is a one-shot (or I think it is anyway - the ending was...definitely final), everything seems rushed and confusing. I think it would be an excellent story however.

Good plot - keep writing!