Great start! Sounds really interesting. I like your writing style a lot! -- J.max :-)

So... when are we updating?

Hm...interesting. I suggest you not put everything out in open like that; it kills the suspense.

So far, your grammar is really good! I haven't found many...

Keep writing!

Hmm... of to an interesting start. I like the thing about the Margetins. *AuthorAlert* I'll be waiting for chapter two...