Nice story! I just started reading some of your work, and its great. Can't wait to read the next one. ;) I love the characterization. I can vividly picture Madam Hart :p. I'm not a very good critique myself, but I do think you did a pretty good job of everything. The one thing I did (not) see was descriptions of the setting. For instance, what does their living quarters look like, and what does the candle shop look like? I don't know too much about short stories... so bear with me if I'm completely wrong.

Cute... Cute... Sorry, I'm not sure I really see it going anywhere. The characters all seem so onesided... Of course I probably just don't know them well enough yet... I'm assuming this won't be updated since it's so old, but oh well. I'll jsut wait for Eden!

To be perectly honest, I'd wondered about this story for a while. Now I'm finally reading it (while waiting for the next chapter of Eden). Cute so far. Only two reviews, I noticed. *tear tear* I'll keep reading.

I liked this chapter. I am truly amazed at how good you are at introducing characters. I love it! Great job!

This oddly reminds me of, "Hi-Hi-Puffy-Ami_Umi"! I liked it, I don't see how it could be a multipal book story, but, it is the first chapter after all, Keep it Up!