where are you? i miss this story and deer!kaleb !

=O I wanna know what happens next! Why would he kill her if he loved her...o.O Weird. I have no CC, even though I do try hard to include it all the time...^^; Nice job anyway!

Aw... WHat will happen next? Next chapter please!

This story is amazing! Very well written and detailed, and also original. I loved the cliffhanger, and the way you unfold the plot as you go along. You're a great writer! Keep up the good work!

This is a neat story, I like it! : )

Also, this should make you happy: I updated Riverdance: Tale of a Drow. Link to the new chapter: http:// w. fictionpress.com/read.php?storyid=1943510&chapter=8

Just remove the spaces.

Oh my goodness!! This story is so good...my heart stopped when I read the last line :O:O Please update, I'm begging you!! Please?? I'll do absolutely anything...this story is just so original and awesome and I so want more explanations...

Deepest regards,lilli

This is very original. I like it!! And the cliff hangers, Beautiful!! Keep up the good work!!

Cliffhanger!

Overall, I like this chapter alot. I would suggest that you use other words for "said", though. It gets a bit repetitive. And update soon!

Poor Loriel. It seems like fate doesn't really want her to remember herself. And I kind of thought that Kaleb might have killed her. It makes for a rather nasty irony.

Yeah, I kind of figured that Tarence was a bit dim. Opa obviously loves her godson.

I am stunned beyong belief. I absolutly love this story! I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't believe I found any errors. (Unlike what you would see in my stories) I don't want to ask you to rush, because that is the ultimate crime when it comes to writing, but please hurry!

Hi Karen! Thanks a million for wishing me luck in school, reviewing my poems, and advertising "Letters to Christopher."

Before I give you a review, let me explain that "Pearl of the Orient Seas" is not the name of my country. It's sort of a title. Like, Japan is known as the "Land of the Rising Sun." ^_~

I love the vividness of your imagery in this chapter, and the way you revealed every detail that you wanted your readers to find out. You did it slowly but really powerful. That's good, you won't like anybody to have a heart attack, will you? ^_^ Overall, the content was great.

Update soon!

Talk to you later. ^_^

~Doray

wow. really creative, i love your summary, it really drew me in. i liked this beginning a lot. great job :)

ARGH! Cliffhanger! But, anyway, this was another awesome chapter! And you're writing was clear. Very descriptive, I might add. Especially when everything was coming back to Lori. Write on! ^__^

~ Lunchi

Wow! I love this! thanl you reviewing my poem! Its a cliffy! You meany! *glares* I just wanted to know are you going into the eighth grade or did you just get out of it?

Cheers on chpt. 3! And yes, Stargate = love (which can also be written as 'I love Stargate', but as I've noted before, I'm a bit strange).

Okay, well done. However, I still have a bone to pick about Kaleb--he's still a wimp! I mean...he's being compared to a deer, after all, so I suppose that doesn't help. Though, he's an artist, too. Perhaps he's, uh, one of those quiet types who doesn't kill until he has to? Or the death of Loriel made him a wimp? He got unwimpish at the very end of this chapter, though, so that supports that he's got -some- unwimpishness in him.

The other bone to pick; Tarence...damn, what an idiot. Sorry, but really, Opa's excuse...just...very flimsy. But he bought it. WHY? It was so weak! If she acted like she hated Kaleb, maybe, but she didn't.

Okay, so, I like to poke holes at characters. To be fair, the ones I'm poking at are not perfect; perfect characters are...not human. Yay for Kaleb the deer!

You might want to think about the dialogue:non-dialogue ratio, though...the former is a bit high compared to the latter.

Kudos, well done, and keep it up!