Wow. I love the part starting with the l at midnight, to the end, especially. I also like the "itch on her lips like an allergic reaction." Great work.

Ooh sexy and sweet. . Me like much

Shavo

cool.. the ending is interesting, nice job

creative! where do you come up with it. wow. the whole second part is beautiful!

Good final line but the repetition seemed pointless to me.

reminds me of "The Most Dangerous Game" for some reason, though i suppose that's not too wild of a connection. simple indeed. i like the feel i got from it.

-salt.

O-o-o-o-o, I liked that. the whole midnight part...I really really liked it.

I adore this format. It was rather short, but it was much powerful that way. The way you built up to 'she loves (me) at midnight' was beautiful.

Holy mother of something! Just...wow...

Very cool :)

the build up to it was just gorgeous. the ending is simply fantastic. I adore it, you make her seem so surreal.

* noelle

Urgh, this is just great. Stunning imagery, and (as GypsyMothra said) the build up of "she loves at midnight" is just great, especially with the last line: "she loves (me) at midnight." It just takes the first stanza and puts the girl in the poem in a more vulnerable place... She's the predator, but she has weaknesses. Very very delicious.

You're an amazing writer. favorite author

-marie

LOVE this poem. Fantastic. Imagery is great, as usual. And I love how you build up to "she loves at midnight". Beautiful. This is definitely one of my favorites. And, thank you for that lovely review on "Interloper". I'm so happy I had such an impact one of my favorite authors! :) Thank you!