FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
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| live4today 2005-08-16 ch 1,   | Very funny. I especially like the last line. |
| The Amu 2005-08-15 ch 1, | Eh he he! A great interruption to the monotony of my day. I loved all your little jokes. The end was great. I don't know that I can criticise anything technical either. Or maybe you could try and rework the start to liven the pace. I know it's a very short piece but I wonder if it doesn't take a while to really start going... I dunno. I suppose it's fine the way it is. Well done! ^_^ |