"No hue of pallor in the night cold..." I don't know why but that one line particulary sticks with me...lol well, i love the whole atmosphere of the poem, and even though some might say it's sad and a bit eery, i feel that it decribes death in a beautiful sort of mysterious elegant kinda way...again, awesome job! _ME

Very atmospheric poem - the gentle melancholy is woven beautifully in your words and phrases. 'Dim darkness', in particular, was very nice.

Lovely piece...

beautiful. i like this poem. eerie, but lovely. k/w

just,shadow

This has an eery feel to it. I can see mist floating across the black sea and it once again shows pain well.

Matt

Very dead. I mean that! He is so beyond dead, and you are an angel fluttering around. Not happy, but moving and playing. He can't see you. He is really dead.

Did I mention the dead feel? LoLIt really struck me though; maybe the imagery was unreally REAL...

Aww, this was a sad poem but I like it. Your poems are amazingly descriptive, and I love how well they paint a picture of a scene or emotion. Lovely. I liked 'the song for your eternity'. That was beautiful. Keep writing your lovely poems!

Vivid, beautiful, fulfilling, breathtaking.. (what more do I have to say?) - ADD-san

Each sentence, so crisp with your vivid imagery makes for lovely reading. Great job, thanks for reviewing.

Wow, that's so pretty. It's almost like a song. lol. _ I really liked it. It's so...ethereal like something right out of the span of time.

Woah, really nicely written. I like it. :) I must read more of your poems! :) I'm SO adding this to my favorite poems list. :P

beutiful, death, cold, We all experience death, but it seems brand new everytime.

this was just awesome. your skill with the pen just grows with every word and poem you create. I really liked it, the flow was just amazing and so smooth.

* noelle

beautiful. sad poignant with clear imagery, the word,' Mizu,' in your pen name, is that , 'Water,' the ,' no,' is a possessive, but I do not know, kokoro, except koko, could mean, this place. That was an interesting comment about,' Fiction Press Hotel,' I had never considered the vocabulary, but thanks anyway. dc

Interesting: the rhythm is quite wierd but i think with the subject matter it works. nicely done! iz xx

reminds me of watching someone die in a walking past rooms full of sick children.

sad.